ca·thar·sis
(kə-thär′sĭs)
n. pl. ca·thar·ses (-sēz)
An innumerable amount of factors contribute to the entirety of who we are; however, in the process of moving forward, sometimes we have to take a moment to stop ourselves from habitually looking back when we already know what remains behind.
We need to understand the mistakes we have made in order to prevent future mishaps in the same vein. Yet we cannot draw on these recollections too often; constant dwelling on the errors of our ways hinders us from living in the present. When we fretfully reminisce on events and decisions made in the past, we become stagnant. We are unable to move forward because we’ve chained ourselves to our guilt, our fear, our transgressions, our misapprehensions.
Releasing ourselves from the toxicity clouding our very existences can lead to a variety of reflexive responses, often in paradoxical combinations.
We must remember why we made the choices that we did, particularly based on the circumstances given to us at that very time. Hindsight, as always, has perfect vision. We can spend our entire lives looking back with regret at the decisions we made when we did not have all the tools and information at our disposal. We have to remember how we felt at that time. Even if this decision lead to a tragic mistake, we cannot hold transgressions that occurred against us that were simply beyond our control.
All we can do is accept the choices we have made, take responsibility for the errors that we directly made, and forgive ourselves for the consequences that are genuinely beyond our reach, our ability to mend.
We assume that we have the utmost amount of control when we perform an action within the world, that accidental consequences that would have never normally factored in are our burdens to bear.
We fail to see the irony in expecting perfection in a universe birthed from chaos.
We often forget that, at the end of the day, we are the only ones who have to live with the choices we made, the paths we took, the effort we put in. We forget that the only thing we can genuinely control in the universe is what we do and how we react to what the universe brings back in return.
The universe does not embrace a perfect algorithm as to where you can, without a doubt, provide the perfect action to obtain the desired reaction. We can become well versed in playing the odds, yet we cannot guarantee that every perfectly played interaction will result in success. Even when success looks apparent, we are simply unable to perfectly decipher the silent nuances that keep this game (so to speak) ever changing.
A construct may look and appear structurally sound on paper, yet a singular, almost invisible, fault could just as well rend the whole structure asunder. It may not even be a flaw implemented in creation but a structural anomaly developed over an infinite expanse of time. These elements are beyond our control. To say that the failure or damage to structural integrity is the fault of one person alone (unless purposefully implemented as such) is absurd, yet we find ourselves blaming events, incidents, and accidents on ourselves when our intentions in the whole grand scheme of things were genuinely unadulterated. When others react poorly to a decision we’ve made to care for ourselves, we end up feeling guilty for choosing to make someone else happy instead of doing what needs to be done to take care of ourselves.
The logical fallacies are quite obvious when documented, yet for some reason, in our heads, we feel that others are validated in their consternation towards the pursuit of our own needs. Lost in the moment, we conveniently forget that the people that genuinely care for your well being will not press their agenda on us when we are unable to satisfy our own needs.
We often fail to see the irony in that being made to feel as if we are selfish for genuinely doing what is best to take care of ourselves, when in reality it is that very accuser who is being selfish.
In the end, perception is solely based on the eye of the beholder. Just because someone tells us that something is the way it is does not mean that we have to treat it as the infallible truth. We are able to draw our own conclusions, make our own investigations, and believe what we believe. In the end, it’s all a matter of perspective.
(Author’s Note: Extremism changes the dynamic but not the overall message.)
Nothing in life was ever meant to be static. While it retains its general shape and concept, life is constantly in ebb and flow. Just because something comes in to your life means it will always be there. Just because something leaves your life doesn’t mean it will be gone forever. Even in the toughest of situations, we always have a choice, even if some of the choices are unappealing and not what we want to do.
Life is what we make of it, after all.